Twelve Steps to Reduce Stress This Fall

All it takes for most of us is just one more thing and we're overwhelmed. We've tried to create a less complicated life but we're still stressed. Me, too. So I researched and found the twelve best ways to remove stress from your life. First, simplify

A Simple Life is a Peaceful Life

Simplifying helped me create a more peaceful life. When I was teaching, I worked long hours, ate poorly, and had developed a toxic life.I was full of anxiety, had depression, sleeplessness, headaches and joint pain. There was no room for joy. I needed healthy habits to replace the toxic ones, so I did yoga, learned meditation, and increased my walking and journaling. I retired early. I decluttered my home and donated hundreds of items to charity. I saw a therapist for my anxiety. I ate more vegetables and gave up gluten to reduce my headaches and joint pain. I saw a doctor about sleep apnea and got a machine to help me breathe and sleep better. I followed the serenity prayer~ I let go.

Serenity Prayer

God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,

Courage to change the things I can,

And the wisdom to know the difference.

Reinhold Niebuhr

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For me, stress created illness. Illness is the body's way of telling us to slow down, forgive, or even let go and move on. Here are more steps to help you de-stress.

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Twelve Step to Reduce Stress in Your Mind and Your Home:

  1. Make your health a priority. Is there a doctor's appointment or test you need? Schedule it.
  2. Cancel an Activity. Find one thing on your calendar you can do without. Cross it out.
  3. Start Your Day With Rituals: Keep routines that keep you organized, or in control. Create new ones that are calming. For me, taking my dog out every morning, then returning for my morning coffee are comforting routines.
  4. Pick Your Battles: Families grow and change. Some stages are more stressful. You've set priorities but it's still not working? Sometimes that change must start with us.
  5. Reduce: It's well known that reducing clutter in your home reduces stress. Less stuff=Less to clean.
  6. Schedule Self-Calming Time: Whether it's yoga, meditation, a quiet walk, a good book or a soak in the tub, take time for what calms you. Remember how, before take-off, the stewardess tells parents to put their oxygen masks on first, then the child's? Well, self-calming time is your oxygen mask. Take a breath, relax.
  7. Watch Less: Reduce time spent looking at a screen, especially before bed. Use sound instead of visuals to help you fall asleep. A sound machine, audio book or sleep podcast is a healthier choice.
  8. Follow Less: Unfollow pages or people on social media if their posts give you stress, or just don't give you joy. You can unfollow people and still stay “friends.”
  9. Do Less: Make use of time savers offered by stores and sites. Use curb side pick up for groceries and medications; find meal planning calendars online.
  10. Spend less: If money is your greatest stress, go on a buying freeze, buy only necessities. Check out apps that help you pay down your credit card debt, like Tally, Debt Free, or Credit Card Payoff.
  11. Don't ignore the big problems. Maybe you're considering a big lifestyle change to reduce stress, like leaving a relationship, job or neighborhood. Seek a trusted friend or two to be your sounding board. True friends want to help, don't be afraid to ask. Take steps to talk to a professional, too.
  12. Focus on what you can change. Accept that there are things out of your control, and let them go.

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Conclusion

If you're stressed, it's not your fault. You may need someone to talk to, to help you get through this hard time. Remember, that's what it is: A hard time. A time that will pass. I didn't give up hope and I don't want you to, either. You ARE worth it!

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New Ways to Connect and Support

If this has helped you, please share it with a friend. Also, consider a one-time donation of $5 to “Buy me a Coffee.” Just click on the yellow banner on the right that says, “Buy Me A Coffee.” (scroll down if you're on a cell phone) You'll get a personalized Thank You from me!

What ways you have found to de-stress? Post it in the comments below, or email me at connie@positivelylifeafterfifty.com ~I may share it on my podcast!

A Bucket List That’s Good for You -Episode 5


This episode shares motivational stories to help you create a bucket list that can change your life.
Today I take a look at the surprising history of “The Bucket List,” talk about the benefits of those travel items on your list and share some inspirational stories to help you re-create your own life-changing list.

Have you given much thought to your bucket list lately? You should; it's good for you.
A quick search and you will find the awesome things people have on their lists; from exotic destinations to simple acts of selflessness.

“The Bucket List” became a standard in American culture in 2007 when a movie of the same name was released.

Did the term “Kicking the Bucket” come from a children's game or a method of execution(!?!)

The benefits of having travel items on your bucket list include mental, physical, social and financial.

Here's a list of motivational speakers that may forever change the way you think about a bucket list:

  1. Ryan Eller, Motivational speaker and blogger, ryaneller.comHow a Bucket List Saved My Life” TEDx Tulsa
  2. Kathleen Taylor, “Rethinking the Bucket List” TEDx Tampa Bay
    Kathleen is a Licensed Mental Health Counselor with 20 years experience in hospice and advanced care planning. She has a coaching and consulting practice serving the healthcare, social service, and nonprofit sectors.
  3. Edward Readiker-Henderson,  “Kill Your Bucket List” TEDx Maui talk
    Edward was an award-winning travel writer and traveled to over fifty countries and all the continents.  He is quoted as saying,”Whoever created the world went to a lot of trouble. It would be downright rude not to go out and see as much of it as possible.”

The Joy of a “Wonder List”
Maybe you think your life is just too busy even to consider taking that trip right now. Don't worry about your to-do list, or that time is running out to visit all the places you hope to see and memories you hope to make. Sometimes the best moments are unscripted.

One”wonder moment” I had on a trip with my family became a treasured memory for me, and an “I wonder” moment blessed me with a life-long friend from the other side of the world.

Mark Twain quotes:
“Don't wait; the time will never be just right.”
“Give every day the chance to become the most beautiful day of your life.'

**Teach us to number our days, that we may gain a heart of wisdom. Psalm 90:12

Having a Positive Life at Any Age

 

Ever notice how the new people hired at work seem to be getting younger and younger but the face in the mirror doesn't?

Are you nearing age 50 or have already passed it and you've noticed that the voice in your head is changing from “ I’ve got plenty of time to do that” or I’ve got my whole life ahead of me” to “How is it I REALLY want to spend the rest of my life?”

Or maybe your looking for some positive motivation and inspiration on how to become a better you at any age. Are you thinking you’d like to contribute more to the world around you but don’t know how to fit it in to your busy life? Or has life become so complicated because of problems at work, with your family,or your health and you don’t know where to turn? Maybe you've lost your job or are worried about losing your job, or want ideas on how to gain focus and strength but lose some of the stress that has become a constant companion.  Worried about your aging parents and their abilities or disabilities, or maybe about keeping your own mind sharp?  Perhaps you've just gone through a life altering event, or someone you love has experienced health issues, and its made you rethink and redefine what true success means to you.

My name is Connie Minnell, and I'm truly grateful that you are visiting here today. This is so exciting and rewarding, but I'll also admit, for me to even get to this point of delivering this to you has been overwhelming, challenging and …..intimidating! I mean,  Abraham Lincoln said it best, “Better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to speak out and remove all doubt.” Well, here I am doing just that– speaking out!

But I’m speaking out because it seemed that no one else was —I couldn't find what I was looking for in a helpful podcast and website for people in midlife. I was looking for a podcast to motivate me to become a better person all around – INCLUDING physically, mentally, and spiritually. Sure there are lots of websites and podcasts that address many issues separately, but I couldn’t find one central location where someone in midlife could find all these things in one place. A place that provides helpful research, interviews with specialists and with courageous people who have accomplished great things in their forties, fifties, and beyond; a place with inspiring words of wisdom from people who have “been there”. I needed to know that there positively is life after fifty!

Today, I'm going to tell you a bit about myself, and then I'd like to look at two ideas that changed my life's story and I believe can make a positive impact on the next chapters of your life, as well. Like many of you, I am reminded daily that we all have but one life, an undetermined amount of years to pursue our dreams before either our heart or our mind quits working, one chance to show the ones dear to us how much we care about them, one chance to make a difference on future generations.

Currently, I am reaching those future generations. I'm an elementary school teacher in a public school, a job that I love and have dedicated my life to. Through those years, I have learned how the children, parents and often-times, grandparents cope with the harsh realities of life. My love of helping others through teaching is in fact, one of the reasons why I wanted to start a podcast –To help bring a positive influence to people who are in the middle chapters of their lives. My desire is to help people, and myself, make sense of this time of life that brings such changes and uncertainty. Teaching and learning goes to the very core of who I am.

Now I said earlier that I was going to include two ideas that recently made a big change in my life, so here they are:

Point #1: The only guarantee in life is change, how you respond to it is your choice

Big changes do happen in your life – weather they happened by your choice or not – and these changes are always are intimidating in the beginning. Yet there is nothing more sure in life than change. Children, plans, dreams, people—they all change. Most of the time change isn't a bad thing, but inevitably – it is a hard thing. That's when you need the help of friends, of family, of professionals, all who are there for you to listen, guide, and hold out a helping hand.

 When faced with changes, it's easy to have your mind fill with doubts and negative thoughts.

But don't allow your mind to be overpowered with words of negativity: A simple, light-hearted example of that is the phrase “Over the Hill” –Americans are fond of throwing “Over the Hill” parties when people have their milestone birthdays of turning 30 -40 and 50 years old—-“Over the Hill” is a tongue-in-cheek term used frequently in the US and abroad –which means you are past your prime. As a matter of fact, according to the latest report from the CDC (the Center for Disease Control. The average life expectancy in the US is 78.7 years. Does that mean “the top of the hill” would be just a few months past age 39? So by age forty, we're already beginning the downhill slide? Well then, what's fifty and beyond?

That's what I hope to help us define- or better yet, to help society RE-define- what getting older looks like. You've heard all those depressing “D” words that USED to describe life after fifty — downhill, decline, difficulties, degeneration and disease, this group of D words was compiled by authors Dr. William Sadler, and Dr. James Krefft, from their book Changing Course Navigating life after Fifty.

Instead of allowing our focus to concentrate on the D words, lets try replacing them with “RE” words worthy of our 21st century world of positive living—or at least the knowledge of healthy living:

Words like renewal, reinvention, rejuvenation, redirection and regeneration —–these from Dr's Sadler and Kreft—- and another one I'd like to add – re-career.

We've all heard stories of people we know who retire to a life of leisure, some of my own relatives included, only to enjoy that life for a few short years, just like we all know of someone who kept working –volunteering—busy—far into their eighties or nineties. Dr. Mehmet Oz addresses this in the article “Living Long and Living Well” – Dr. Oz states: “have a purpose — your family, your work, your community. There may be no better longevity booster than simply wanting to be here. You have one life; it makes sense to love living it.”

Point #2: Find unusual ways to stay positive – like going OUTSIDE your comfort zone

Staying positive could mean taking on a challenge and going outside your comfort zone. I experienced that recently by signing up for a class . Now , I'm a life long learner, so taking another class was definitely within my comfort zone. But this was just ANY class, this was an online class- never did that before – and it was a class that taught all about podcasting- something that didn't even exist a few years ago.

Learning podcast production has taken me far outside my comfort zone, but an amazing thing happened: I began to notice little things: Like, I didn't seem as tired after putting in the usual long day at work, my energy became renewed, my spirit was revived, my life seemed to be regenerating. I was becoming more positive just by being challenged and putting myself out there.

Taking this course seems like a small step, but many people out there are taking giant leaps—

For example, in a report on the Mother Nature Network by Melissa Breyer, the celebrity MSNBC's star cable news anchor and best-selling author Dylaln Ratigan took a giant leap of faith. He gave up a powerful career, sold his Porsche and Manhatten, New York loft, moved 3,000 miles across the United States to the west coast, and bought land with an old log cabin that he now lives in. Ratigan then used his own assets to start a hydroponic organic vegetable farm, and is in the process of creating a network of greenhouses cared for and run by veterans. These vets are gaining new skills and a new lease on life. Dylan Ratigan re-careered and seems to be very passionate about his new life.  Moving through fear takes courage, but it means you're moving, you’re alive! Maybe its time to pursue some dreams, maybe its time to let go of others and make new ones. 

Please subscribe to my feed, because we'll be hearing from some amazing people who have taken giant leaps of faith in the act of reinventing themselves in the second half of their lives.

During the following days until my next episode, I'd like for you to remember these two words that are intertwined; challenges, and choices. Each choice brings challenges, and every challenge has its choices.

If you have read this far, then I sincerely thank you from the bottom of my heart. I encourage you not to miss out when I have a new post or a new podcast. And while you're here, please leave a comment, questions, or tell me what topic you’d like to have discussed in future podcasts. CLICK HERE to leave a message.

Thank you so much for joining me today, and remember, there is Positively Life After Fifty!